Signs of Unhealthy Relationships
Putting Up Boundaries
It's SO much easier to AVOID an intimate or close relationship with a potentially abusive or narcissistic person than to GET OUT of a relationship with this type of person. THIS CANNOT BE STRESSED ENOUGH!!!
KNOW the signs of what an unhealthy, clingy, or over-the-top intense relationship looks like. If you feel like there are RED FLAGS, then respect that feeling and act on it. Put up boundaries and start to distance yourself from that relationship. You don't have to be rude, just slowly move away from being close to that person. The more you allow that person into your personal life, the more influence they will start to have on you, and the harder it will be for you to distance yourself. In relationships that are unhealthy, THE SOONER YOU LEAVE THE BETTER! Learn about setting boundaries HERE!
Excessive Texting-Red Flag
Anytime one partner texts the other excessively, this is a warning sign. For instance, texting non-stop usually indicates that one partner is clingy and needy or that they are feeling insecure in the relationship.
Excessive texting can also be a form of love-bombing, which is an attempt to lure you into a romantic or serious relationship.
Excessive texting—especially when it involves demanding to know where you are, who you are with, and what you are doing—can even be controlling and abusive. If you're in a relationship with someone who texts excessively or aggressively, you may want to distance yourself from them.
What are some red-flag signs of Excessive Texting
They’re always available day or night
They text you 24/7 with very few breaks
They reply to your texts within seconds most of the time.
They ask a lot of questions in order to keep you engaged with their texts
They love to share gossip (juicy information about others) to keep you engaged with their texts
They flatter you to keep you interested in their texts (and in them)
They speak non-stop about every single little things in their lives - at times they share very personal information
They often talk about their problems and drama with their family members and with other friends.
They make you feel like you are their closest friend and that they need your friendship in order to be happy.
They depend on constant feedback (texts or phone calls) in order to feel like they are important.
They seek affirmation: They put themselves down hoping that you'll tell them how wonderful they are.
They try to create drama with you to get your attention.
You can tell that they are jealous if you do things with other friends and don't tell them about it or include them.
If you don’t reply to their messages they will get upset or pout.
They might also text your family & friends to ask about where you are and why you are not answering.
They are very insecure about a lot of things in their life: their looks and whether or not people (especially you) like them.
They don’t understand the idea that every person needs a personal space or “Alone time”!
They are impatient and want your answers immediately, if you don't answer right away they question if you really like them.
They push the relationship way faster than is natural or comfortable.
They want you to share everything with them, even if you haven't been friends very long.
They want to make sure that you are completely invested in them and their life by sharing all their problems with you.
They also are very invested in your problems and encourage you to tell them everything that you are thinking, feeling, or doing.
If you try to establish boundaries, they usually ignore them or pout or get upset. Your boundaries threaten their feelings of self-worth.
If you are the recipient of excessive texting, consider establishing boundaries. If they don't respect your boundaries, you may have to block or mute them. This is the first step in establishing a healthy relationship. If the relationship has become romantic, try to distance yourself emotionally. Remember that you are not responsible for making the other person happy.
Recognizing Personality Types that are Prone to Manipulation and Abuse (Cluster B Disorders)
Cluster B disorders are marked by inappropriate, volatile emotionality and often unpredictable behavior. The disorders in Cluster B are antisocial personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, histrionic personality disorder, and narcissistic personality disorder. If you notice several or many of the below-mentioned symptoms in your, consider putting up healthy boundaries or distance in your relationship. Learn to recognize these RED FLAG behaviors.People with these disorders have intense, unstable emotions and distorted self-images. For people with histrionic personality disorder, or HPD, their self-esteem depends on the approval of others and does not arise from a true feeling of self-worth. They have an overwhelming desire to be noticed, and often behave dramatically or inappropriately to get attention. The word histrionic means "dramatic or theatrical." -WebMD
Needing to be the center of attention (self-centeredness)
Quickly changing emotions, which may seem shallow to others
Constantly seeking reassurance or approval
Being easily influenced by other people
Being overly concerned with their looks
Being overly dramatic and emotional
Being overly sensitive to criticism or disapproval
Overestimating and desiring closeness in relationship
Blaming failure or disappointment on others
Difficulty accepting criticism or negative feedback
Having a low tolerance for frustration or delayed gratification
Uses appearance to draw attention
A person suffering from HDP may turn to manipulation or abuse to ensure that your attention stays on them. This validates their sense of self-worth. When you ignore them or pay less attention to them, they may lash out in anger, guilt-tripping, jealousy, or use threats to ensure your attention stays on them.
People with ASPD may disregard others' rights, property, and feelings, and may have frequent problems with the law. They may also be impulsive, reckless, and lack empathy and responsibility.
repeatedly breaking the law.
repeatedly being deceitful.
being impulsive or incapable of planning ahead.
being irritable and aggressive.
having a reckless disregard for their safety or the safety of others.
being consistently irresponsible.
lack of remorse.
People with BPD may have unstable perceptions of themselves and may experience feelings of emptiness. They may also have difficulty managing anger, and may experience anxiety, depression, or dissociative symptoms. Self-harm and suicide attempts are common among people with BPD.
Fear of abandonment.
Unstable relationships.
Unclear or shifting self-image.
Impulsive, self-destructive behaviors.
Self-harm.
Extreme emotional swings.
Chronic feelings of emptiness.
Explosive anger.
People with NPD may have an inflated sense of self-worth, and may believe they are superior to others. They may also have fantasies of unlimited success, power, or beauty, and may expect to be recognized as superior. They may also have a sense of entitlement, and may take advantage of others for personal gain.
Grandiose sense of self.
Excessive need for admiration.
Superficial and exploitative relationships.
Need for control.
Lack of empathy.
Identity disturbance.
Difficulty with attachment and dependency.
Chronic feelings of emptiness and boredom.
Some other features of cluster B personality disorders include:
Unstable lifestyles
Over-compensatory coping styles
Interpersonal dysfunction
Poor self- and emotion-regulation
Problems with perspective taking
High levels of antagonism